Sunday 29 May 2016

d100 Urban Rental Nightmares in Shadelport



Rent in shadelport for adventurers. After their first haul adventurers seek better living standards. The city redlight district is a favourite district is full of tomorrows bitter murder hobos. Many are favorite rubes for con men and shapeshifters. Fires, plagues, criminals, evil land lords all are menaces murder hobos dont want to face monthly.


These assume apartment buildings or side by side rows of housing in a cramped overcrowded poor area. In Shadelport the nice parts of town wont even let shabby adventurers in.

d100 Urban Rental Nightmares in Shadelport
01 Fire in building, firemen ask for money to help put out
02 Burns to ground overnight with a d6 other houses
03 Small fire in house or building causes some damage
04 Neighbors die of drug abuse
05 Neighbors door kicked in and murdered
06 Neighbor found long dead and partly eaten by animals
07 Plague sign marked on door of building for quarantine
08 Corps found on door step
09 Gang move in next door
10 Gangsters hanging out on doorstep ask "what are you looking at"

11 Rats in the walls
12 Giant rat in bed

13 Stray cats hang around building
14 Zombie heart noisily beating under floorboards
15 Fungus out break
16 Bats in the roof
17 Neighbor is a werewolf or wererat
18 Leak in roof
19 Sewerage leak in building
20 Floor or ceiling collapses partly leaving a hole
21 Serial killer tries to kill you 
22 Neighbor climbs in window to steal loose change
23 Phantom haunts the building
24 Whipping and screaming from neighbors  
25 Pervert drills holes through walls to spy on you
26 Moths eat clothes and leave food full of grubs
27 Flea infestation
28 Neighbor dies and and arises as zombie
29 Birds living in roof
30 Stirge owls living in building
31 Crazy cat lady moves in next door
32 Giant tick gets in through floorboards
33 Locals abandon babies on your doorstep
34 Termites start eating building
35 Tiny stove troll lives under stove
36 Brownies in roof, punish people who swear
37 Gremlins move in causing hilarious shenanigans
38 Jesters living nearby have noisy drunken parties
39 Band move next door and practice all night
40 Witch neighbor gets annoyed by you and curses with her evil eye 
41 Landlord like collect rent in case your broke to collect in sexual favours
42 Horrible drunks sleeping in the stairwell
43 Wasps build a nest in chamber pot or somewhere not fun
44 Hood wearing cultists among neighbors 
45 Lost pet reticulated python loose in between walls
46 Stray children in between walls and roof cavity
47 Goblins in the basement
48 Orc neighbors cook strange smelling food
49 Neighbor likes to slaughter animals at home and has poor sanitation
50 Necromancy students neighbors slip out to steal corpses by night
51 Stray vulture get in home
52 Rabid dog in street
53 Drunken landlord demands more money and starts fight if you disagree
54 Drunken landlord snoops in your place while your away
55 Evicted because landlords relatives homeless
56 Evicted because building demolished
57 Evicted for building redevelopment for hipper nicer tenants
58 Alchemist next door steals stores poison chemicals  
59 Rat with human face bites you in your sleep
60 Carnivorous jelly oozes up through drain pipe
61 Stray sailors monkeys break in and rearrange furniture
62 Mysterious bloody stain keeps appearing
63 New tenants set up a drug house and dump corpses in lane weekly
64 Building graffiti covered by youth gang
65 Giant beetle eaten several tenants this month
66 Skinny homeless teens harass adventurers for work
67 New landlord demands tenants are tidy church goers
68 Hailstone ruins roof
69 Wall collapses
70 Imp tormenting and murdering local tenants
71 Old drunk wizard neighbor casts spells in his sleep
72 Assassin trying to kill neighbor with incomplete address
73 Cultists looking to collect human hearts for imitation
74 Giant mushrooms start growing from dungeon spoor
75 Former criminal tenant wants treasure hidden in house
76 Drug crazed killer hiding in building
77 Gong farmers blacklist area, sewerage everywhere in street
78 Secret police seen spying on building, identity unclear just look creepy
79 Snooty citizen claims writer once lived in apartment, declared historic site
80 Former tenant was a gambler and thugs visit demanding cash
81 Lesser demon banished here a hundred years ago finally returned 
82 Some rival adventurer dropped some troll meat in crack in the floor
83 Giant fly enters through window and steals food and leaves maggots
84 Amateur black powder maker blows his apartment up
85 Someone in building distributing treasonous documents
86 Tax man makes a visit and estimates your net worth and leaves a bill 
87 Strange fungus growing on ceiling
88 Giant leeches come out of sewer in the rain
89 Rat colony in your bed
90 Fungus people children grew in the wall cavity and now in your house 
91 Mosquitoes molest building inhabitants from sewers
92 Bull goes wild in market, runs up stairs and into your flat
93 Hole collapses into sewers on bottom floor, sewer goblins come out at night
94 Adventurer neighbor died while away and secret pet owlbear gets hungry
95 Religious neighbor leaves you pamphlets and preaches to you
96 Green slime develops a colony in building attracting city officials
97 Neighbor cavorting with lesser devil makes horrible noises
98 Orc gang members move in next door and party all the time
99 Secret policeman's mother moves next door and spies on everyone

100 Thief practicing reading magic summoning scroll summons a angry dinosaur

So after a few more dungeon looting expedition you will be finding a better class of neighborhood.

With different horrible problems

Saturday 28 May 2016

Best month in 4 years here



On a self puff note as I count down to post 850 and half a million views I have been getting a thousand hits a day without other blogs or reddit links to blame so this month has been my busiest month in 4 years so thank you. This probably means newer readers not signed into g+ or blogger - most incoming from google searches. Thanks everyone

I did this brief description for non readers:

It's my mostly zero edition DnD blog where I post random d100 tables of horrible things to happen or encounter in scenarios. Its like a writing practice challenge to crank out imaginative stun in a non fiction format. I like fictional world building and tables do this nicely. I can write snippets on bus to work and in bed. Its what I do instead of haiku or crossword puzzles.

How dense? How Fast?
1991 Cyberpunk Culture Ethos describes what is here. It is deliberately not commercial or professional.

I'm mostly influenced by Rabelais, history, classics, mythology, fairy tales, epics, comics, fantasy of 1800-1938 (Clark Ashton Smith) and the 60's new wave (Moorcock, Spinrad). I cant read most fantasy and SF books

Occasionally art, 1/72 miniatures, maps, tabletop roleplaying and military gaming culture stuff.

Other stuff
I'm glad to see some young drama teachers teaching LARPing today at place I went to look for work as art teacher so very promising. There was a pic of educational stock d20s on wall. I've stopped commuting interstate and looking locally for work. Doing 2 design jobs for gaming stuff too. Was evicted second time in 3 months from new share house.

d100 Weird Village Encounters



d10 Quick Weird Village Encounters
1 Animals
2 Children
3 Folk art
4 Cover ups
5 Shops
6 Odd locals
7 Farming
8 Monuments
9 Outdoors
10 Strange People

d100 Weird Village Encounters
01 Two headed d4 1=kitten 2=lamb 3=dog 4=turtle
02 A goat eats a rat with frog like adhesive elongated toungue
03 Huge spider webs around trees and roof tops
04 Giant fly snatches a baby or cat and flies away
05 Giant rat runs under a building
06 Cow eating a rabbit
07 A dog vomits up some fingers
08 A horse tears a shred of flesh of a farmers leg and eats it
09 Bats fly out of a chimney
10 Old woman talking to cat who whispers answers back in her ear
11 Children chanting in strange elder language
12 Child sucking on headless squirrel
13 Child with overgrown fang sticking out of mouth
14 Children playing with pet black rats
15 Children running from giant bed bug
16 Siamese twin baby googling sweetly
17 A child asks if visitors are the chosen ones elders speak of
18 Bulging eyed pudgy child drawing demon sigils on walls with chalk
19 Baby bites a dog which runs away in terror yelping
20 Staring silent children each holds a pet familiar
21 Statue made from animal skulls covered in blood
22 Villagers frolicking in masks some not really wearing a mask
23 Villagers performing a puppet show for the kids full of heresy and treason
24 Child with a creepy straw doll drops it in visitors belongings
25 Elaborate totems of wood, horn and herbs on every house for the old gods
26 Regional odd hat that all the locals wear
27 Local metal work features a strange design and unfamiliar characters
28 Villagers torturing a local who broke the local code by some bizarre means
29 Villagers have welcomed a strange clever man from a foreign city to live here
30 Villagers all wearing jewelry (metal, wood. horn, stone) with a sinister face design
31 Butcher selling strange creature parts he gets from local cave
32 Baker seems to have a supernatural fire spirit his oven
33 Highly skilled craftsman making amazing diabolic designs
34 Local drunk tries to arrange to meet you about something sinister and is never seen again
35 Tavern keeper offers vices and narcotics on par with the debauched cesspits of the city
36 Storekeeper uses quite a few odd coins "adventurers found" JD Jarvis Hellcoins handy
37 Beer tastes funny and the brewer also uses strange body parts from local cave for local flavour
38 Strange figure designs on fabric woven and knit by local old women
39 Locals in bar playing strange game with large monster teeth
40 Roof repair man often attacked by stirge owls living in the attics of local houses
41 Street covered in sawdust over a rancid pool of gore they say was a wagon accident
42 Headless corpses suspended by pole by the executioners block, heads missing
43 Church has had a cheap facelift on the outside, cobwebbed mess inside
44 Pile of large beast heads near a bonfire ready to burn, no bodies present
45 Wanted posters from the city law have been painted over and torn down
46 Border stones and official signs have been wrecked or vandalized
47 Local tax collectors don't want to stay here the night and afraid of witches
48 Free stew and village having a party, someone asking about missing friend
49 Naked villagers drunkenly asleep wearing nothing but robes or goat leggings
50 House burning down with new family that sadly didn't fit in trapped inside
51 Swine like fat greedy merchant or friar who everyone seems to love is a devil swine
52 Mayor often seen in regalia, a gold necklace with magic medallion and hooded cloak
53 Attractive progressive and tolerant holy person beloved by villagers border on public heresy
54 A local sorcerer with a d4 "students" have been teaching locals esoteric arts and drug abuse
55 A formerly famous adventurer gives map to local dungeon he now secretly serves
56 A hideous old woman stares at you lots, locals fearful but all sworn to protect her
57 A wizard tower with vegetation surrounding it affected by chaos or necromancy
58 Large old graveyard with a few prehistoric monoliths run by a necromancer working as mortician
59 A famous prostitute linked to royalty from the city has come to stay but seldom takes visitors
60 Rugged muscular priest is actually a werewolf, outsider animals hate him
61 Root vegetable crops squeaking and wiggling underground
62 All the farm work is done overnight by something and the villagers lazy
63 All the farm animals have same eyes and often stare at visitors creepily
64 Goats dancing on hindlegs and bleating being encouraged by shepherds
65 All the large and healthy animals have some colouring and markings
66 Farm animals being beaten with sticks or clumsily killed sound almost human as they scream
67 Scarecrows in the fields look very creepy and strange, curfew after midnight
68 Animals all act the same and come and go without herders
69 Farm hands beating one of their own into bloody pulp while chanting
70 Farmers preparing a wickerman with animals in cages in the limbs already
71 Iron bar sealed old well that allows water be drawn out but not monsters
72 Stone plug sealing an ancient sinkhole into caves
73 Squat ancient idol in village centre with food, burnt offerings and bone sacrifices
74 Short wall section is forgotten foundations and old chambers exist under the village
75 A creepy prehistoric mound nearby is used for dancing on by drunken locals
76 A statue with a missing head and odd physiognomy het highly detailed and realistic
77 A fountain from a lost age with worn but quality art, 1in6 works and has a man size drainhole plug
78 A statue of a notorious cult leader from many generations ago who founded village
79 Locals point at the elder monolith with fear and warn you not to sleep near it
80 Standing stones seem to move at night and occasional fall on someone
81 Creepy trees in woods sway in unison without wind being felt
82 Strange howls heard from the woods
83 Strange fetishes on the borderland with the forest
84 Spirits in the forest make it unsafe at night all locals say to strangers
85 Snakes are seen everyday outside by everyone and locals unafraid
86 Villagers have a pump that draws water by itself with a switch the locals say is a bound demon
87 A huge ancient tree looks thousands of years old and has secret passages and chambers
88 Several sinkholes and caves are known to be in the area but villagers publicly shun them
89 Colourful toadstools rumoured to be associated with a evil god are commonplace
90 People and animals are sometimes swallowed up by the earth if they stray far from village
91 Robed order perform rituals in ruins or groves or caves publicly
92 Some local sport being played with grisly body parts used ass the ball
93 Drunken festivities grow wild with eventual fighting and orgy in the streets
94 Lynch mob flailing a prisoner with whips till they drop over crime they wont mention
95 Lynchmob forcing a prisoner to run a gauntlet of villagers with rocks
96 Village come out to watch a execution on old strange blackened tree stump here since olden days
97 Villagers chasing and beating a apprentice cleric preaching in the country for his studies
98 Village choir and folk dancers singing, then they get drunk and start ritual castrations
99 Village militia practice targets are old painted wooden statues from a run down church
100 Villagers having a funeral where locals sing strange song about fate of persons soul

I will do a totally messed up one for use in nightmare lands, villages in or from hell or when players in Black Stump in my hell campagn when it is visited too many times and hell has corrupted it.

Wednesday 25 May 2016

Hell's Underworld 2


The underworld is mostly colourless and shadowy. The soil is chalky and greyish. Chunks of rubble and loose soil covers most surfaces with crumbling clffs and hills with loose slopes. Mild quakes shake the land. Gloomy skies with dusky light reveal the distant chasm roof. Palid rays of light pierce dust, ash and fog suspended in the air. Stalactites and stalagmites the size of mountains sink into the distance. Caves and crevices are common.

The land is also a depository of wisdom and fructifying powers of fertility for the mundane world. Depositories of ancient documents are a common treasure. As hell is timeless prophetic lore is available also.

Remnants of the past and future can be found. Future remnants like ruins of your home of damned spirits of people you know or future offspring to still be alive can be disturbing. Promiscuous adventurers might be confronted by their dead children wanting attention. Future knowledge might make powers of the underworld vindictive and unwilling to allow you to leave.

The distant past is also to be found in remnants. Powers of ancient beast and hunter cults can be found. And ancient gods forgotten on the mortal world still live here.

While the underworld is dangerous, imprisonment and depressing tedious gloom is more common. The gods imprison the undying enemies of old here to keep an eye of them. Many beings will try to get explorers to help them. Many are starving or desperate for decent food after an eternity of eating dung and ash.




Hazards are obstacles to impede progress which can be avoided by cunning.
Encounters are mostly combat.


d100 Hell's Underworld Hazards
01 Strong winds blow ash clouds
02 Huge electrical storms
03 Strong hail storm
04 Blinding fog
05 Choking smoke clouds
06 Raining burning sulphur
07 Clouds of thousands aggressive bats
08 Rains chunks of rock from cavern ceiling
09 Mountain size stalactite fall from above
10 Violent earthquake shakes ground 

11 Rolling boulders
12 Lightning striking ground

13 Slope of loose rubble will dump travellers into another hazard
14 Avalanche of rubble slides down hill 
15 Massive canyon in earth
16 Crack opens in earth and threatens to swallow explorers up
17 Huge pool of mud
18 Ash heaps that swallow up any who walk on it
19 Mounds of revolting garbage and feces
20 Mounds of jagged bones
21 Stone wall
22 Devil watch tower
23 Gatehouse and wall with officious devil guards
24 Huge bridge with gatehouse and devil guards
25 Devil fortress ahead watches area
26 Devils rounding up unauthorized damned in wrong area
27 Devils fencing off damned with bone fence
28 Devils tormenting giant in a pit, looking for something to do next
29 Demon bounty hunters looking for escaped prisoner or possibly a substitute
30 Devils blinding a cyclops who goes on murderous rampage when they fly away
31 Swarm of starving damned looking for anything (or one) to eat
32 Screaming mob of damned with clubs, screaming and smashing everything 
33 Zombies climbing from burials
34 Angry skeletons searching for something or someone
35 Burning screaming damned running hysterically
36 Phantoms wandering, become angered by living
37 Gibbering phantoms swarming ahead
38 Giant lifting a boulder and hundreds of hungry skeletons swarm out to escape
39 Line of zombies holding hands for a d6 miles
40 Wall of bound hungry zombies that snap at anything near them
41 Giant golem looking for intruders to stomp on (iron or bronze)
42 Wall of living snakes a mix of poison and constrictors
43 Devils tearing off clothes and robbing newly arrived damned
44 Devils herding damned in corals flailing of their flesh and releasing skeletons
45 A huge sleeping hydra in pit ahead
46 A tree with a huge bearded snake offering healing and wisdom and prophecy
47 A gigantic horned snake 
48 Migration of skeleton animals on way to be be reincarnated
49 A demon with swarms of bugs and lesser demon entourage following it
50 A skeleton beast headed shaman is blessing animal skeletons
51 Lake of fire blocks path
52 Volvanic vent explodes just ahead
53 Styx the river of hate ahead causes rage if touched
54 Lethe the river of forgetfulness causes memory loss
55 Archeron the river of pain causes paralyzing agony to the touch
56 Cocytus the river of wailing ahead causes uncontrolable wailing
57 Phlegethon the river of fire in the distance burns to the touch
58 Ferry jetty with bell on one of the underworld rivers (see 53-57)
59 A underworld river with a devil whale or kraken immune to river fx (see 53-57)
60 A flooded open pit mine with aquatic horrors fighting
61 Dragons fighting up ahead
62 Frozen over river (see 53-57)
63 Drunken idiot giants flinging excrement at each other
64 Devils gambling over larvea
65 Cottage of a nighthag
66 Stables where devils tend thoroughbred nightmares
67 Beastmen cavorting and dancing around totem of the beast god
68 Serpent men worshiping a serpent demigod in a fruit tree
69 Nighthags and devils trading in larvae
70 Devils tending larvae pits on look out for rustlers
71 Hyenamen gorging selves on idiotic damned
72 Sheer cliffs
73 Sea of broken bones
74 A stony maze with a monster living in it
75 Sphinxes block the path through a gorge demanding knowledge or riddle battles
76 Hundreds of statues with a cave in the middle where a medusa lives
77 Wizened forest full of harpies
78 Stymphalian birds guarding a relic out in open ahead
79 Huge crowd of damned listening to snappy maxims of a philosopher blocks valley
80 Iron bull killing damned with deadly fumes he exhales 
81 Desolate poisoned waste with corpses and snakes with basilisk king on high point
82 Cyclops orcs building a monument to their ancestor they seek to deify
83 A lamia territory ahead, enthralled damned slaves attempt to kidnap attractive men
84 Erinyes tormenting and strangling a freshly damned king ahead
85 Manticores being jerks and abusing damned souls 
86 Swarms of stirge owls sucking blood from helpless damned
87 Nightmares frolicking in fields, chasing and eating damned souls 
88 Grey ash heaps full of giant ant lions
89 Queue of damned going over horoizon, freak out if any cut through or push in
90 Thousands of squirming snakes cover plain
91 Shallow water full of corpses, actually zombies and will arise to kill living if disturbed
92 Graveyard where hands of zombies burst out of ground if intruders enter
93 Fungus garden with mushroom men growing crops on sleeping damned
94 Wrestling giants with damned watching for winner
95 Two armies of damned fighting in confused melee
96 Damned farmers scratching soil with farm tools, enraged if anyone walks on fields
97 Chimera sleeping on a peak overlooking plains covered in mauled corpses of damned
98 Bronze bulls gather to fight for kingship of herd
99 Underworld satyrs tormenting nymphs, enraged if seen by mortals
100 Crumbling stone bridge over flaming pit guarded by devils


d100 Hell's Underworld Encounters
01 Zombie mammoth on rampage
02 Stampeding zombie bison migrating to hunting grounds
03 Wolf pack tracking mortals
04 Panthers ambush from cliff or tree or by stealth
05 Giant constrictor snakes
06 Several large venomous serpents
07 Bearded or horned wizard snake
08 Lamia (serpant or other beast body) looking for slaves and food
09 Sphynx is hungry but will spare for a riddle or good titbit of information
10 Shedu looking for wicked up to no good in underworld

11 An evil naga seeks slaves and food, will have human or snake men minions
12 Goat beastmen looking for victims to abuse and eat

13 Underworld nymph and her charmed lovers looking to add to her concubines
14 Wild underworld satyrs like to hurl victims into underworld rivers and steal women
15 Hydra hungry for flesh
16 Medusa wearing hood, approaches strangers to petrify them
17 Iron bull with toxic breath angrily attacks any mortals
18 Night hag on a nightmare seeks souls to convert into larvae and use as currency
19 Minotaur warriors looking for food
20 Ogres looking for food or loot
21 Ogre magi seek victims to abuse or sell to other evil beings
22 Devil swine in human form try to offer feast to ambush guests and enslave them
23 Salamanders (flaming lizard type) crawl from fiery crack to attack
24 Giant looking for food
25 Demon bounty hunters seek intruders to sell to devils
26 Devil troop demand intruders surrender and be judged
27 Vulture men demand meat
28 Rat men who hate human like beings and try to eat them
29 Young inexperienced dragon looking for snack and loot
30 Bronze or Iron golem sent to kill party by a god
31 Skeleton soldiers in bronze armour
32 Skeleton warriors sent by underworld lord
33 Zombies surprise by bursting from underground
34 Wights once ancient noble warriors, vassals of death god hunting the living
35 Wraiths arise from earth hungry to eat that which lives
36 Phantom dead rise from the earth demanding food and wine or blood
37 A horrible spectre rises from the earth rattling chains
38 A ghost arises from a pile of bones
39 A ghoul pack hungrily crawl from barren old crypts 
40 A ghast pack climb from old grave pits
41 Werewolves hunting game for a devil lord they serve
42 Werepanthers in the service of the death god hunting intruders
43 A vampire knight serving a underworld goddess
44 A vampiress with a palanquin carried by seven ghouls looking for lovers to eat
45 A chimera comes charging from it's cave lair
46 Manticores on cliff tops surround party hungrily 
47 Flock of harpies shit diseased turds onto explorers then attack
48 Stymphalian birds overhead shower explorers with razor sharp metal feathers
49 Cyclops hungrily steps from cave licking his lips
50 Crippled titan crazed with revenge on mortals
51 Cyclops orcs warriors seek victory for their ancestral god
52 Grey skinned goblins with bone clubs crawl from pits and charge
53 Hobgoblin soldiers on patrol
54 Skeleton chariots roll over a hill and charge
55 Skeleton cavalry gallop furiously towards intruders
56 Skeleton horse archers circle party and fire while avoiding melee
57 Zombie griffons attack from the sky 
58 Earth elemental mixed with human corpses arises from the ground 
59 A fire elemental arises from ashes of a funeral pyre
60 A water elemental formed from the blood arises from a pile of fresh corpses
61 A air elemental full of choking cremation ash flies from above
62 Stirge owls hungry for blood swarm from the sky
63 A lost bard looking for knowledge or his dead love begs for help
64 Hyenamen warriors laughing madly and hungry for flesh
65 Tasmanian devil men crunching on bones exited by sight of meat
66 Giant hungry lizards crawl out from under rocks
67 Baslisk crawls out of a stinking hole
68 Necromancer with cyclops orc followers needs to top up his life force
69 Necromancy students lost by accident
70 Squad of lesser devils demand to see your passport and travel permits
71 Skeleton wizard riding a zombie t-rex looking for trouble
72 Erinyes accuse adventurers of mass murder and have come to strangle and stab them
73 A styx devil in robe with scythe come to punish the living
74 Skeletal giant with sceptre and wig demands you join his commonwealth or die
75 Filthy giant in ruined rich clothes looking for people to eat
76 Swarm of hungry damned souls bezerk with hunger
77 A giant flying stone head lands and filthy beastmen disembark to attack
78 A screaming vengeful pack of women damned looking to tear people apart  
79 Carnivorous albino apes out for revenge on human kind for supplanting them
80 Doomed centaurs mad at everyone, circle with bowfire then use lances to finish off 
81 Giant regenerating lion hungry for humans with grey fur
82 Rotting naked giant with stag skull and antlers for head, hungry for mortals
83 Hellhounds sniffing out those who don't belong here
84 Imps determined to make your life unpleasant, use invisibility or shape shift for tricks
85 Hungry damned horde demand 90% of travellers blood to pass 
86 Old man on a donkey actually a cup bearer of a death god in disguise
87 A damned relative of explorer found a babbling miserable wreck (one of the lucky ones)
88 A ghost galley sailing in sky drops phantom and skeleton pirates who attack
89 A devil prince offers your help, no catches, honestly 
90 Wailing woman in black robes with gold mask actually a banshee
91 Chorus of mourning damned in black robes turn into erinyes if ignored
92 Lady devil riding dragon demands all gold and silver goods
93 Multi headed crowned devil riding giant panther demands all your wealth
94 Mass of hungry damned fused together in a mess of limbs and revolting features
95 Swarm of damned kids attack, while claiming those who hurt them are damned 
96 Ghost town of damned phantoms who arise to drive off any who might touch their stuff 
97 Silent worn stone statue actually a insane stone golem 
98 Son of demon prince orcus with chaos goat men raiding underworld for larvae
99 Fog coalesces into a hungry giant before explorers eyes
100 Hydrodaemons flop out of body of water greedy for tasty humanish flesh

Tuesday 24 May 2016

d100 Mildly Suspicious Village Happenings (+more hell stuff)



Hell Project Progress

I did like the ones in dragon magazine and was disappointed they didn't get officially used. Manual of the planes kinda disappointing being mostly full of spell mods rather than adventure seeds. 

My first three Hells: 1 Plague lands, 2 Infernal lands and 3 Underworlds were based lots on literature, art and mythology. I have some rough plans for the following:

4 A swamp
5 A frozen hell
6 The dark dimension
7 Nightmare land
8 Something like a  Buddhist and Chinese hell's with endless rooms of horrible torments. It might feed into
9 Bosh-Brugel hell based on their late medieval surreal paintings full of metaphores. I just have to find my books in storage. Just found out i gotta move for second time this year so glad I didnt unpack much yet. Should be easy with books.
10? Still unsure, posibly something with elder gods and dinosaurs

Naming them a bit of a issue too (fantastica, fantastisch, somnium). Need to be full of grotesquery and rabelaisian shenanigans

Black Stump is a quiet little decrepit village out of the way. Unfortunately once you have arived you are trapped in a temporal null zone. The only way out is to enter one of the entrances to hell and escape through the netherworld. Other suspicious villages can be found all over Exile Island that are tainted by cultists. Plenty of others are a bit off and local cults are pretty common. Using these in a random village might lead to murder hobos turning witch hunters and killing whole villages.

d10 Quick odd happening types
1 Animals
2 Children

3 Folk art
4 Cover ups
5 Shops
6 Odd locals
7 Farming 
8 Monuments
9 Outdoors
10 Strange folk

d100 Suspicious Village Happenings

01 Suspicious murder of crows staring at strangers from rooftops and trees
02 Followed by black cat, runs away under ladder and under fence if noticed
03 Sly one eyed toad stares from crack under doorstep
04 Goat stares at visitors then makes odd screaming bleats when sees adventurers coming
05 Rats run across road and over feet
06 Chirping bird swarm about making strange noises07 Two headed lamb being inspected by villagers who then hide it from strangers
08 Huge ferocious black dog barks ferociously but stops when owner glances over
09 Horse goes wild, screaming till brutish man whips it away
10 Huge black cock crows when you enter village street

11 Group of similar looking silent children staring creepily staring at visitors
12 Little girls singing scary skipping songs

13 Boys dissecting a puppy
14 Creepy googly eyed child nodding head non stop and drooling
15 Kids chasing cat with sticks
16 Little girls playing witches with broomsticks and pets
17 Child drawing occult signs on wall with chalk
18 Kids performing ritual like game throwing flowers and chanting around mud idol
19 Woman with creepy googly eyed baby
20 Odd pale kid playing flute or other instrument follows party playing weird tune
21 Corn dolls or dogs with some bloodstains
22 Strange chalk sigils drawn over house doors
23 Burned remains with bone human teeth fragments
24 Strange costumed dancers chasing each other with sticks and demanding coins
25 Maypole dancing youths
26 Dancing led by beast mask wearer
27 Animal skulls on posts
28 Dancers in monster costume with terrible bagpipe band
29 Villagers singing strange folk song while working
30 Villagers beating scapegoat animal in ritual
31 Odd child size muddy hole behind a house 
32 Bones scattered in streets locals say are from pigs
33 Happy dog running off with suspicious looking bone
34 Villagers finishing burying something look awkward and leave
35 Villager throws something in well when sees strangers
36 Merchant covers and removes some goods on display
37 Some villagers quickly eat something when they see you coming
38 Farmers quickly bury something when they see you coming
39 Strange footprints in muddy street
40 A hasty bonfire with villagers burning something smelly
41 Strange idols for sale along with normal goods
42 Weird deep sea fish being sold by bulgy eyed fish monger
43 Butcher chopping up chunks of mystery meat gleefully
44 Vendors selling curse tablets on the side
45 Candle maker boiling up foul smelling tallow for new candles
46 Baker only sells special pies to locals
47 Blacksmith makes and sells exotic knives, some for locals only 
48 Carpenter stops sawing and stares at you, starts sawing when you look away
49 Tailor selling hooded capes and beast head masks for festivals
50 Shop refuses to sell to outsiders, "local shop for local folk"
51 Other villagers drag away the friendly drooling village idiot
52 Village drunk slinks away somewhere out of sight
53 Kind village elder asks how they can help you on your way
54 Old woman ask if you need healing, potions or enemies cursed
55 Man offers unusually marked pets for sale
56 Locals have interesting tattoos
57 Locals have unusual jewelry 
58 Locals have unusual deformity, birthmark or other bodily feature
59 Locals have unusual turn of phrase like "we welcome strangers to our feasts"
60 Local tries to seduce party member and get them alone somewhere
61 Bountiful crops with folk idols on each plot 
62 Unusual marked animal in pen alone with lots of food
63 Strange scarecrow surrounded by crows
64 Youths tormenting a animal for fun
65 Sweaty farming youths wink compellingly at strangers
66 Farmers hanging a pig from a tree to butcher it with strange knives
67 Labourers singing a strange work song
68 Local farm youths chasing a piglet with hammers
69 Farmer passionately kissing a cow
70 Farmers having break, one dancing with a goat
71 Worn stone block with old blood stains 
72 Stone pillar with skull shaped niches
73 Cliff or boulder with ancient carved pictographs
74 Several old graves with archaic symbols of old faith
75 Abandoned, vandalised  shrine of popular faith
76 Headstones re purposed for building a wall
77 Church in dilapidated condition with missing symbols
78 War memorial statue with missing head and limbs
79 Stone sarcophagi covered in iron bars
80 Strange rock formation with hoof prints
81 Unusual plants in garden for poison or magic
82 Farmer tying dog to mandrake root to harvest the magical herb
83 Children gathering holly berries and leaves to build a human fetish
84 Hunters putting on wolf pelts and ointment
85 Shredded old fishing nets and broken boat unused for years
86 Corpse wrapped in blanket of nettles shoved in a bush
87 Burned remains of wicker man
88 Old man carving creepy faces in pumpkins and turnips
89 Villagers leaving out baskets of food while singing by a large boulder
90 Villager talking to farm animal ignoring strangers
91 Old woman chanting and gesturing to stars
92 Evil staring old man playing with fancy knife 
93 Old women with cauldron on camp fire
94 Old woman sitting with cat having a chat
95 Fat guy gazing at strangers rubbing groin and drooling
96 Hooded figure in distance watching strangers
97 Farmer carrying bucket of blood to make bloodwurst sausages
98 Men throwing sword into a pond 
99 Men throwing a dead dog and coins into a sinkhole
100 Fisherman throwing engraved wax tablet and bucket of gore into pond

will do a very suspicious village happening perhaps one day

Saturday 21 May 2016

Hell's Underworld 1



I have a big wet sloppy surprise for post 850 coming up

Others in this series
http://elfmaidsandoctopi.blogspot.com.au/2016/04/hells-infernal-lands-1.html
http://elfmaidsandoctopi.blogspot.com.au/2016/05/hells-infernal-lands-2.html
http://elfmaidsandoctopi.blogspot.com.au/2016/03/hells-plague-lands-1.html
http://elfmaidsandoctopi.blogspot.com.au/2016/03/hells-plague-lands-2.html

Hell's Underworld 1
This series for my hellscape project is chugging along still. While influenced by art and literature the previous hells were more vicreal and bodily. This hell is gloomy, boring and more inspired by ancients. The previous hells were more evil this one has a wider range of alignments. Possibly the newer hells with fire and torment demonstrate increase in alignment conflicts in the multiverse. Devils are less influential here too but can be found with other evil outsiders and undead. Devils guard gate houses and sections of the underworld and operate the bureaucracy rather than actually torment the imprisoned. Some parts of the underworld are prisons with devil jailers but generally do not torture victims.

This hell is a land of despair, loneliness, gloom, doldrums, melancholia and sadness. It is littered with ruins, dung, funerary monuments and ash heaps. The damned here are desperate for food, wine, luxury and worship. Many will request they are given libations, sacrifices and monuments in exchange for services. Some dead live well if they are given offerings by their descendants. Some were once kings but now forgotten they dwell in ruins and eat dung and ash. Many damned here are tormented by useless  repetitive futile actions. Pride and greed are sins dealt with here. The proud are cast down by pointless deeds and the once splendid are brought low by wretched poverty. Hubris is pride against the gods and they jealously punish human arrogance. Tortures are mostly psychological but some are physical. Imprisonment without respite is the main condition of damned here. Most social mobility is downward. As your descendants no longer sacrifice to you, or your grave goods are stolen or people no longer pour libations to your name the damned are increasingly left with nothing.

Without ancestors to celebrate your deeds with offerings and sacrifice you will be a wretched pauper, Some damned are filthy, weak and wretched, begging for scraps. Some have shut down, laying in comatose heaps from depression. Seeing the poverty struck childless suffer might influence characters to have children and build monuments to themselves and erect shrines

Most damned are naked humans but some are phantoms or skeletons. Most damned are self obsessed and barley aware of surroundings. Some might communicate and some might have died in the adventurers future and be able to share prophetic lore.

d10 Typical Damned (most are naked)

1 Paralyzed frozen in some pose with extreme emotional expression
2 Laying immobile unconscious
3 Laying in fetal position moaning
4 Rocking on ground, pulling hair wailing
5 Running around hystericly sobbing
6 Sitting gibbering about regrets
7 Scratching in dirt, ash or garbage for food, desperately hungry
8 Cunningly tries to get others to aid it escape
9 Translucent phantom mostly moaning or repeating some action
10 Skeleton usually walking about silently

Monsters and horrors defeated by gods in the dawn time are imprisoned here as punishment and mortals are best to leave these horrors where they are. They might beg for release or try to trick explorers but this will anger the gods and could result in your imprisonment in the place of the monsters you free. Many plot to escape or plan machinations to ruin the mortal world or torment the beloved of the gods.

Dressings are common scenery and wonders less common spectacular scenery. The don't create immediate danger and are easily avoided unless explorers deliberately choose to interact with them.

d100 Hells Underworld Dressing
01 Grey distant stalactites in sky
02 Cavernous grey sky
03 Gloomy grey sky
04 Spooky mist
05 Schools of bats
06 Great grey shadows in sky moving
07 Violet auroras dancing in the overcast sky 
08 Grey clouds moving in the sky
09 Eerie fog sweeping over ground
10 Distant moaning and wailing

11 Great spherical boulders
12 Featureless grey plain

13 Huge stalagmites 
14 Dripping water falling from great cavernous sky
15 The great river in the distant
16 Distant volcanic eruption lights up distant sky
17 Black clouds from distant eruption
18 Ground is moist and slippery like a cave
19 A plain of moon like craters
20 Grey cliffs in distance
21 Crumbling foundations and broken columns
22 Decrepit remains of graveyard
23 Sprawling necropolis in mostly ruins
24 Ash heaped hills with chunks of bone and broken urns
25 Heaps or crumbling skeletons
26 Chalky soils of bone meal
27 Plain of dug open empty graves
28 Plain of water logged grave pits
29 Skeletons fused into limestone cave formations
30 Plain of scattered occasional naked corpses
31 Plain of stacked naked bodies covering the ground
32 River with a crumbling jetty and bell for ferryman
33 Grey muddy knee deep swamp
34 Grey muddy swamp filled with rotting corpses
35 Shallow knee deep pools of grey water
36 Plain covered in scattered dung
37 Plain covered completely in dung
38 Gloomy desperate naked damned eating ash from ground
39 Wailing desperate naked damned eating dung from ground
40 Crying naked damned sitting and laying everywhere
41 Great mound of squirming wailing bodies
42 Desolate plan scattered with paralyzed madmen posed still
43 Giant or cyclops bound in chains sobbing
44 Flowing river of grey mud with drowning damned wailing
45 Naked person chained to rock sitting sadly 
46 Small cell with several wailing damned
47 Small ruined fort converted to miserable prison
48 Giant sprawling prison complex with wailing and moaning
49 Robed damned carrying bread and wine, runs when sees you
50 Former king in rags tries to buy food with last scraps of royal crown
51 Small village of starving indolent sitting about complaining
52 Crumbling town of naked beggars with fortified town houses keeping them out
53 Sprawling crumbling city with rich ignoring the naked huddled masses
54 Damned chained to cliff
55 Damned chained to cart wheel on pole
56 Damned in gibbet hanging from tree 
57 Ground quakes for a minute
58 Twisted tree with agonized faces of damned
59 Crack in ground with wine or blood being lapped up by hungry damned
60 Stalactites fall from sky and shatter
61 Bound man being eaten by vultures and jackals
62 Swarm of naked damned moving over plain
63 Crumbling house with miserable damned inside gibbering madly
64 Huge naked giant eating damned from cage
65 Huge swarm of screeching bats
66 Damned cooking a pot of bat stew
67 Naked man dragging leaking sack of copper coins
68 Naked damned being chased by bats
69 Naked damned fighting and biting each other
70 Naked damned eating a corpse
71 Plain of phantoms wandering sadly
72 Plain of mad damned, twitching, muttering and rocking
73 Drooling giant with head injury smiling and staring
74 Demon bounty hunters dragging damned in chains
75 Shambling manour house rattling in the wind
76 Pits of starving children begging for food and help 
77 Pits of larvae being attended by lesser devils with pitchforks
78 Dragon in chains crying
79 Chained giant with snakes dripping venom on face
80 Naked damned farmers uselessly scratching dirt with farm tools
81 Dozens of damned trying to commit suicide and it never works
82 Giants pushing huge boulders
83 Giants dragging stone blocks
84 Crumbling palace with scattered finery, beggars at gates
85 Stone sarcophogi
86 Leafless forest of twisted trees, actually former tormented damned
87 Valley of tombs
88 Steaming bubbling crater pools surrounded by mineral crystal formations
89 Stone barrow hill tomb, doors wide open
90 Stone menhirs covered plain
91 Headstones built into sprawling crumbling fort
92 See strange shadows of friends act oddly and independently of owners
93 Pre human crumbling monolith with strange writing
94 Great forgotten crypt
95 Gloomy mountain carved with tunnels and mines
96 Heavy rain pours down for a d4 hours
97 Clouds of ash carried in wind from distant eruption
98 Burning remains of funerary pyres
99 Damned being swollowed by great serpents
100 Plain of writhing serpents crawling over bone assemblages 

d100 Hells Underworld Wonders
01
 Evil forgotten god chained to mountain being gnawed by dragons
02 Entourage following and attending devil or ancient god on palenquin 
03 Dead being judged by devil court with losing damned being fed to monster
04 Huge crater with chained titan sized horror that calls your names 
05 Huge black stoned incredible mausoleum
06 Titan bound to ground being gnawed on by damned mortals
07 Titanic beast trapped under mountain looking sad
08 Colossal stone maze with damned trapped in walls
09 Titan being devoured by beasts eternally
10 A collosal library guarded by dragons

11 Cracks in earth with hundreds of damned inhaling sweet fumes
12 Priestess on high chair over crack in earth inhaling fumes

13 Titanic bull bound in chains
14 Huge damned armies batting while opposing gods or devils watch
15 Titanic skeleton of humanoid or horrible beast
16 Huge devil playing with naked wailing damned like toy building blocks 
17 Weeping black robed giantess over plain of dead soldiers with tears of blood
18 Colossal stair case to higher or lower cavern realm guarded by devils
19 Rows of enigmatic stone sphinxes
20 Worn stone pyramid or ziggarut 
21 Blind crippled giant crawling on fours sniffing for food
22 Giant hand crawling and looking for rest of body
23 Colossal statue of ancient god or devil 
24 Giant eating own intestines
25 Filthy giant in ruined rich clothes drunkenly laying in pool of vomit
26 Gigantic stone skull with a tavern inside full of damned souls 
27 Hundreds of broken statues with sad expressions 
28 Hundreds of miserable giant stone heads
29 Broken titanic statue half buried with boastful text about ruling forever on base
30 Shipwreck half buried in sand
31 Huge open cut mine pit with a chained forgotten god in the bottom
32 Dilapidated incomplete huge tower reaching to the sky
33 Ruined coliseum with phantom gladiators
34 Huge floating stone head flies slowly overhead
35 Huge walls made of sobbing damned 
36 Triumphal archway vandalized and worn by wind
37 Shallow lake choked with corpses
38 Hundreds of naked people sheltering in cliffs from rain of fireballs
39 Sprawling ruined walls and archways filling valley floor
40 Sprawling slum with thousands of damned wallowing in ash and filth for food
41 Thousands of damned falling from sky onto a corpse covered plain
42 Burning lake of fire
43 Huge waterfall in a river with screaming damned going over falls
44 Clouds of floating screaming damned rolling across the sky to beyond horizon
45 Hundreds of smoking funeral pits with dozens of zombies wandering around 
46 Headless giant looking for head
47 Huge pit with hundreds of damned wrestling
48 Huge pit with hundreds of damned fighting snakes
49 Hundreds of smoking vents and exposed limbs struggling to break free from ground
50 Cerebus the colosal three headed dog eating and chasing damned
51 Thousands of naked crying damned wallowing and fighting covered in mud
52 Huge crater with hundreds of dragons spawning
53 Styx the river of hate in the distance
54 Lethe the river of forgetfulness in the distance
55 Archeron the river of pain in the distance
56 Cocytus the river of wailing in the distance
57 Phlegethon the river of fire in the distance
58 Famous ancient hero with devil entourage judging the dead
59 Huge wall with spectacular gatehouse and devil guards
60 Volcanic vent growing into volcano
61 Volcanic explosion exposes flaming pit of lava
62 Earthquake cracks open ground and wailing damned pour out
63 Earthquake cracks open ground and volcanic ash blocks out the sky
64 Earthquake cracks open ground and lava pours out
65 Earthquake cracks open ground and creates a huge canyon
66 Quake causes huge chunks of cavernous sky to fall and shatter into rubble
67 Lightning bolt shatters mountain  
68 Semi collapsed stone dome, favorite haunt of harpies
69 Ruined cathedral a lair of wolves or panthers
70 Well of memories restores lost memories
71 Ruins of location familiar to explorers that seemed ok last time they saw it
72 Spiraling circular ziggurat, noble devil on top and wailing damned fighting to reach top 
73 Titan catching damned and sucking meat off skeletons that then run away
74 Huge roots from sky guarded by a dragon who gnaws on them
75 Marching hoard of damned with flailed skin hanging from skeletal necks like capes
76 Huge pyramid of ash and garbage with thousands of damned scrounging for food
77 Huge mound of flailed human skins with crows and vultures eating them
78 Huge structure of thousands of caged damned prisoners stacked into a pyramid
79 Thousands of damned chained to giant devil using them as playthings
80 Crumbling aqueduct from horizon to horizon usable as highway 
81 Step pyramid with lines of damned climbing to top where devils skin them and eat hearts
82 Titanic skeleton with ramshackle garbage shacks of town built in rib cage
83 Huge open pit mine full of garbage and water and wretched damned wallowing in filth
84 Huge funeral barge with hundreds of damned working oars and a small town inside
85 Huge devil dropping damned into meat grinder where skeletons crawl out of ground meat
86 Huge devil squatting and shitting out skeletons which run away
87 Huge light flaming house beacon surrounded by damned unable to get in
88 Huge triumphal procession of devils, underworld and forgotten gods with entourages 
89 A huge fountain of wine guarded by devils gleefully maiming desperate damned
90 A titanic dragon with children guarding a mountain of treasure
91 Huge open mine pit filled with fire and screaming damned
92 Sleepy toad devil squatting on monolith while dancing damned perform around him
93 Huge sabbat of damned witches and familiars and devils cavorting
94 Angels chained to cliffs begging for release and offering gold and true love as reward
95 Titanic throne guarded by devils used by underworld god occasionally
96 Colossal court house complex where judges and ancestors assign punishment damned
97 Enormous tree with jewels and rich food in branches, desperate damned trying to reach
98 Titanic underworld god in chariot crosses the sky, horses with flaming manes
99 Skeleton horse pulled chariots of skeletal warriors hunting for intruders
100 Titanic bronze golem stomping on anyone intruding into underworld, some managed to get inside it where a small town thrives